Why I Will Be Okay

I know no one said life would be perfect when I got married, if anything most people said the opposite. I was delusional, though. I tuned them out and figured that while *their* experience was less than perfect, mine would be different. I would be the newlywed who would have a perfect life from the get go. Oh how wrong I was. These past almost 8 months have been harder than I could have ever imagined. I have moved to a different country, moved into an apartment and then a few month later moved into a different (much better) apartment, dealt with drama and illness, finding out the hard way our rabbits were most definitely male and female and now, I am pregnant.

The only thing planned in all of that was moving to Canada and starting a family. I definitely didn't want to have to move again once I had gotten settled up here, but the living conditions at the first place were awful, our neighbors were insane and we just couldn't do it anymore. Luckily, we found the perfect place, have an amazing landlord and neighbors and an extra room.

The illness has been a big trial for me, while I have never had the best of immune systems, lately its been like I don't even have one. I swear I have been sick since Trajan and I came back from our honeymoon. If it's not a cold, it's weird digestion problems that doctors can't explain. Or I have the cough from hell, or I'm just puking everywhere because morning sickness is a wonderful, wonderful thing. It feels never ending and I don't know if I feel worse for Trajan, or for me.

That's a lot of whining though, isn't it? Well, now that I have gotten that off my chest, let's get to the point. The reason why I will be okay. That reason is simple, Trajan. Without my amazing Husband I don't know where I would be right now. He has been there for me through thick and thin, through all of the break down, puke fests, panic attacks and depression induced comatose episodes. He doesn't make me feel terrible if I don't get to dinner one night, or if I haven't done dishes in awhile because I can't motivate myself to move. He has been behind me 1000% on my realization that I need to be back on depression medication and is supporting me through the emotional roller coaster that that, has taken me on. Trajan is literally my knight in shining armor and I am so blessed he is in my life and will be the father of our child.

I know I will be okay because I have Trajan by my side. I am so blessed and knowing I am sealed to him for eternity just sweetens the deal for me. He is my best friend and I hope I never have to know life without him!